Lent Day 5 - Carrying A Heavy Load

"If you forgive men their transgressions,

your heavenly Father will forgive you.

But if you do not forgive men,

neither will your Father forgive your transgressions."

You cannot say that we were not warned.  How many people are there on this earth that are carrying a heavy load of hatred on their backs? The saddest part of being burdened with hate is simply it is a burden that no one will help you carry.  It is yours, and yours alone to trudge around with. It affects your health, it affects your mental health, it does no one any good but you still carry it. 

Read the scripture passage again. Read it slowly, let it sink into your very soul. Forgiving someone is not just a suggestion from Jesus, it is a command. Let me tell you about something that happened to me.  This is a true story.

My mother worked for a doctor. As part of her employee benefits, she was to receive free medical care.  One day she showed a growth on her shoulder to the doctor. The doctor though nothing of it and gave her some ointment to put on it.  after four months of this "treatment" it was no better.  My mother visited with another doctor friend and showed him the growth.  He immediately put her into the hospital where the cancer was removed.  She received treatments and scans showed that she appeared to be cancer free.  Them, about six months later the scans revealed the cancer was back in the form of a very aggressive form of lung cancer. Mom was scheduled for surgery and her children were there and she was sent off to the operating room knowing that she was loved.  The surgeon did the best he could and the surgery bought Mom about a year he said.  Four days later my mother lapsed into a coma, she had given up.  She died with her children around her. At the funeral I noticed two women sitting alone and I went up to them and thanked them for coming.  My sister came up to me afterwards and told me that one of the ladies, she pointed out which one, was the doctor that cared so very little that she could not be bothered to properly treat my mother.  At that moment my heart filled with hate for this so-called doctor.  We buried my mother and I went into depression.  I did not recognize it as depression.  I lost interest in things.  I was a great reader and kept reading the same books over and over. I quit taking care of the little things in life and felt sad all of the time.  Had that doctor come before me during this time, I think that I would have been capable of killing her and believing that I had done the world a favor.  The hate had possession of my soul.  Going to work every day I passed a Catholic Church.  It was my habit to make the sign of the cross when I passed a church because I knew that inside those walls was the Holy Eucharist, the very Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity of Christ.  One day i had followed my custom when I heard a voice inside me telling me to forgive that doctor.  I broke, then and there, with tears in my eyes I forgave that doctor.  At that very moment, the cloud I was living under disbursed, the depression left me and I was able to take up life again.  There was one lasting effect that I carry with me to this very day.  I cannot hate anymore. I have forgiven the woman that killed my mother. What more could you do to me that would be worse? 

I think that the important part of this story is that forgiving did much more for me than it did for the person I forgave.  It gave me my life back.  Besides, the person who was the object of my hate did not even know it. So, forgiveness will bring much more to you.  It will bring peace to your soul.  Mind you, I would not invite this woman to lunch, but I also would wish her no harm and I prayed that God would bless her.  Was this hard to do?  Well, it took me six months of misery and pain to do it, so it was not the easiest thing I have ever done. But the peace it brought to me was a gift from God

Do not forget that for a Christian, forgiving is not optional, it is required.  We cannot enter heaven with hate on our soul.  Heaven is a place of great joy and happiness and discord is not allowed there.  Imagine if I met this doctor in heaven and still had hate in my heart for her.  Hate cannot exist in heaven for God is Love.

Lent Day 5 - Believing is Not Enough

For I was hungry and you gave me food,

I was thirsty and you gave me drink,

a stranger and you welcomed me,

naked and you clothed me,

ill and you cared for me,

in prison and you visited me.'

'Amen, I say to you, whatever you did

for one of these least brothers of mine, you did for me.'

The boy was twelve years old when he accepted the Lord as his savior. The preacher told him he was saved.  The boy grew into manhood and led a life of evil.  He lived life with the attitude that if it benefited him it was good.  He died a rich old man who was fattened on the spoils of a selfish life.  When he stood before Jesus, it was not as a savior, but as the just judge.  The boy asked Jesus why he could not enter heaven. Jesus said it is because you lived your life for yourself and so you reaped your reward on earth and never thought of Me or My Kingdom at all.  You have no place here.  The boy pointed out to Jesus that he had accepted Jesus as a savior when he was twelve years old and he was claiming his rights under the Once Saved, Always Saved doctrine.  Jesus shook his head and asked him where he had heard of this doctrine.  The boy explained how the preacher told him that once he accepted Jesus, he could never be kept out of heaven.  Jesus then explained to him that just believing in Him does not qualify him for heaven.  To just believe is not enough. You have to live your life in the way that I did, I sacrificed my life for all.  I gave until there was no more to give. I loved without end.  Believing in me is a good start but you needed to serve me during your life.  The boy said to Jesus, "If I had seen you in need, I would have moved heaven and earth to help you."  Jesus then showed a moment from the boy's life where he had passed a man who was asking for a handout.  The boy walked right by without even seeing the man.  Jesus told him, "That was me."  He showed him another scene, this was a great mass of people, there were many children.  They were looking through garbage cans for something to eat.  The scene changed to the boy in a restaurant eating a huge meal.  Jesus said, "Those children, they were me."  On and on it went, Jesus showed the boy the times he could have helped but chose to help only himself.  Their time together was over.  Jesus turned and walked silently back to heaven. The boy, tears in his eyes, knew he could not follow. He turned and went the other way. 

First Sunday of Lent - Waiting For The Right Moment

At that time Jesus was led by the Spirit into the desert

to be tempted by the devil.

He fasted for forty days and forty nights,

and afterward, he was hungry.

Today's Gospel reading is the familiar story of Jesus being tempted by the devil in the desert.  I want to talk about the very beginning of this story because I believe it tells us something very important about our enemy, the devil. 

I think that the Holy Spirit proved Himself to be a master of understatement here. After fasting for forty days and forty nights we are informed that Jesus was hungry.  Do you think so?  

The devil is not a stupid being.  He did not approach Jesus at the start of the forty-day fast. At the start of the fast, he knew that we human beings are at our strongest and would be capable of easily casting him off.  No, he waited until the end of the fast to tempt Jesus. The devil knew that was when he had the best chance of being victorious. Jesus, for His part, resists the temptations and the devil trudges off in defeat to await another opportunity. 

As it was for Jesus, so too is it for us. The devil is unlikely to put on a major campaign at the start of our Lenten observances.  He knows human beings are very enthusiastic at the start of a spiritual journey such as Lent.  No, he will wait until we have walked the road for a time.  Then, he will point out very softly how long the road is.  He will put into our head the question, "Does this road always have to go uphill?"  He makes our hunger sharper and our thirst drier as he tells us, "You are not built for this."  He shows how other people are happy and carefree as they stray from the path of Jesus.  Some of us will fall, some of us will stop our Lenten observance and join the crowd that cares nothing for spiritual things. Some of us will fall and we will call upon Jesus to help us. Jesus will help you arise and carry on.  Jesus is with us in every step of our journey during these forty days of Lent.  He will see to it that although our legs are tired and our arms are weary and we feel too weak to continue, that we will have the strength to continue.  Keep Him at your side and you will not fail. 

SINCE WE REMEMBER THE RESURRECTION ON SUNDAY, SUNDAY'S ARE NOT COUNTED AMONG THE FORTY DAYS OF LENT. YOU MAY IF YOU WANT TO, RELAX YOUR OBSERVANCE TODAY.

Lent - Day 4 -The Tax Man

Jesus saw a tax collector named Levi sitting at the customs post.

He said to him, "Follow me."

And leaving everything behind, he got up and followed him.

Then Levi gave a great banquet for him in his house,

and a large crowd of tax collectors

and others were at table with them.

The Pharisees and their scribes complained to his disciples, saying,

"Why do you eat and drink with tax collectors and sinners?"

Jesus said to them in reply,

"Those who are healthy do not need a physician, but the sick do.

I have not come to call the righteous to repentance but sinners."

It was not cool to be a tax collector in the time of Jesus. But why is that?  Back in the time that Jesus was alive and on the earth with us, the tax collector was seen as a collaborator with the hated Romans.  The Romans did not have their own men collect taxes from the local population.  They hired locals to collect the taxes for them.  They paid the local citizen to collect the Emperor's money and paid a small salary to the person willing to do this job.  The Emperor wanted X amount from the people in the province.  Just like today, people kept wads of cash lying around waiting for the government to claim it, not!  The citizen of Israel hated giving their money to the Romans because they were occupying the nation.  In spite of all of the good things that the Romans did, such as bring water to Jerusalem, paving roads and other things, the Jews were not happy paying their hard earned money out to the Romans.  Further, the tax man, when he accepted the job, agreed to supply a certain amount of taxes to Caesar and anything above and beyond that was theirs to keep.  Levi, or as we know him better, Matthew, was a very successful tax man indeed.  How do we know this?  Well, he had the funds to throw a lavish party and to invite every form of riff-raff that served as his closest friends.  We see that even at this early moment in the ministry of Jesus that He was being watched by the Pharisees who took umbrage with Jesus because He was spending time with sinners.  He rightfully says that He does so because the healthy have no need of a doctor but the sick do. 

Let's focus on the calling of Matthew. Jesus was fully aware of the fact that Matthew was a tax collector. Matthew had been chosen to be one of the closest followers of Jesus and later would be called an apostle.  What is surprising is that Matthew did not hesitate, he left everything to follow Jesus.  He was a rich man and I am sure that when he tendered his resignation the Romans were surprised indeed. 

Matthew left all he had to follow Jesus.  He gave up a life where there was no doubt that he would have the comfort of friends, a life where he did not have to worry about what he was going to eat, drink, or what he was going to wear, all to follow the Jesus fellow. What he received in return was a life where nothing would be assured.  This was how strong the message of Jesus was to Matthew. He gave up the things of this world for those of the next. 

Jesus has come into your life this lent and has issued a special call.  He says, "Follow Me."  He calls each of us to step out of our comfort zone and to walk with Him.  As in the case of Matthew, there will be a cost.  Leaving the warmth of our little cocoon and to venture outside in the cold world will make you uncomfortable. But the wonders you will see, the lives that you touch, will make it all worth while.  |Heed the call of Jeus as He calls you with those two words, "Follow Me.:"

Lent Day 3 - Sin and the gnashing of Teeth

Psalm 51

Have mercy on me, O God, in your goodness;

in the greatness of your compassion wipe out my offense.

Thoroughly wash me from my guilt

and of my sin cleanse me.

R. A heart contrite and humbled, O God, you will not spurn.

For I acknowledge my offense,

and my sin is before me always:

"Against you only have I sinned,

and done what is evil in your sight."

R. A heart contrite and humbled, O God, you will not spurn.

For you are not pleased with sacrifices;

should I offer a burnt offering, you would not accept it.

My sacrifice, O God, is a contrite spirit;

a heart contrite and humbled, O God, you will not spurn.

R. A heart contrite and humbled, O God, you will not spurn.

Whatever happened to sin?  Do we sin anymore?  I don't think that we sin any less!  Sin has disappeared from our conscious thought and escapes our attention.  When I was a boy, my sins were always before my eyes,  This was because I was in the charge of God's most cherished employees, the Sisters of St. Joseph.  They made sure that we, meaning the boys in the class, were always aware of our sins. Oh, sometimes a girl would be caught doing something wrong, but it just was not in their nature to go against sister's wishes. Once in sixth grade, I had sinned most grievously.  I pointed out to sister that she had picked only her favorites for speaking parts in the class play.   Sister Margaret Jean was not one to suffer such brashness and insubordination quietly.  I guess that she turned her other cheek for some things and not for others.  I was quickly and efficiently dealt with.  She just about flew over to where I was standing, you never, ever, spoke to a sister while your butt was in contact with a chair.  She grabbed me and placed me out in the hall facing the wall.  Then for next several weeks, while the other kids went to practice her play, I got to stand in the hallway facing the wall until they came back.  The finishing touch, meant to put me in my place, was that she gave me a "D" in school spirit on my report card.  To show you how rare that was, it was once thought that to get a "D" in school spirit, you had to be caught with bottles of gasoline with rags stuck in the necks and a lighted match in hand ready to burn down the school.  Going against the "Teacher's Pet" system was almost as serious.

A sin of any type comes between God and us.  If you think of the punishment of the rebellious angels was when St. Michael, my patron saint, by the way, swept them from heaven into hell, the major part of their punishment was forever being unable to see God.  There was a barrier placed between them and God.  This barrier caused great sorrow.When we sin, we too create a barrier between us and God.  If we sin in a minor way the barrier is not total.  If we commit a major act of rebellion the wall we build shields us from the Face of God.  If we die with this wall in place, our choice becomes permanent and God will honor our choice to be without Him in eternity.  A preacher once was preaching about sin and hell and he yelled out, "And there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth!" A voice of an old lady in the back of the church piped up and said, "But pastor, I don't have any teeth."  Without missing a beat the pastor replied, "Teeth will be provided !" 

I might be dead wrong about this but I think we have lost or sense of sin. In the olden days, especially during Lent, the lines at the confessionals were long.  Today, not so much.  I got myself in trouble on the Catholic Answers forum once.  I mentioned in a reply to another member's question that I thought the sacrament of confession was underused by Catholics today.  I was given a "major violation" and was told that it was none of my business if someone went to confession or not.  The self-righteous moderator missed the whole point of what I was saying.  I no longer participate in Catholic Answers forum because of this but my contention still is that the sacrament of penance is underused today.

Lent is a time to clean up the cobwebs that have gathered in our soul. But confessing to a priest, can't I go directly to God and ask for forgiveness?  Of course, you can and it is a brilliant first step. But the way Christ wants us to do it is to confess to Him through the priest who is acting in persona Christi. You see, sin is not a private matter between you and God.  We are all part of the Body of Christ and any sin, no matter how private, hurts the Body and needs to be healed. But, you say, "It's been years since I last went!"  So what? Mention that to your confessor and he will be even more gentle with you because he knows how hard this is for you.  Oh, the act of confession was never meant to be easy.  It is a very humbling experience to be in confession and to give voice to what God already knows.  Getting it out on the table is the first step in getting your imperfection healed.  Do not be afraid of seeing who you really are.  Remember, what we are is how God sees us and he sees us, imperfect as we are, and loves us anyway.  Whisper to God and listen for His reply.  His reply to you, the prodigal son or daughter, will always be, "I love you, welcome home!" 

Lent Day 2 - Take Up Your Cross

Jesus said to his disciples:

"The Son of Man must suffer greatly and be rejected

by the elders, the chief priests, and the scribes,

and be killed and on the third day be raised."

Then he said to all,

"If anyone wishes to come after me, he must deny himself

and take up his cross daily and follow me.

For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it,

but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it.

What profit is there for one to gain the whole world

yet lose or forfeit himself?"

It is not a question of whether or not we are going to have to carry a cross in life, no that is not the question at all.  The question is s how are we going to react to the cross or crosses we are given to carry? No man or woman has gone through life without a cross to bear. In this world that we live in a cross, pain and suffering are things to be avoided at all costs. Mind you, I am not a person who would volunteer to wear a hair shirt, or put rocks in my shoes, or kneel on rock salt while saying my prayers. But I can see the value in suffering if it comes to us.  All too often we waste the pain and outrages that happen in life.  We do not have to go looking for suffering, but when it comes we should not waste it.  We should offer it up to God in reparation for our sins and the sins of others. Jesus tells us that if we reject the crosses we are given, we only win in the short term.  

Taking up our crosses can take many different forms.  Matthew Kelly gives this illustration.  You open the refrigerator and see the last can of soda.  Your body says, "Yes, Yes! Grab it, I want that." To discipline your body you tell it, "No. We will have water."  This saying "no" to yourself is a good way to discipline yourself.  This is a cross that you pick up voluntarily.  

But what about those crosses that come unbidden?  What do we do about those?  You receive a diagnosis of a chronic, life-changing disease, or you watch a loved one in great suffering but you are unable to do anything for them, what do we do about these crosses? We accept them of course.  We do as St. Paul tells us to do and we join them to the sufferings of Jesus on the cross.  We bear what we can bear patiently and ask the Lord to help us to bear what we seemingly cannot.  Suffering of any sort reminds us that we are but a creature and allows us to rely on God for the strength to come through it all.  We remember, we have a God that has been through great and tragic suffering.  Jesus, in his early life, suffered the death of his father Joseph.  He consoled his mother on her loss.  Jesus felt the pain of betrayal when Judas Iscariot gave him up in the garden and again when Peter denied Him.  Jesus suffered a brutal beating at the hands of the Romans and was nailed to a cross and felt the loneliness of death.  He has been there and he defeated all of these things including death. 

Finally, remember that Jesus will help you bear any cross that is given to you. Be open to the help he sends through others.  Be patient and know that He is God.  

Ash Wednesday

For many of us, myself included, Lent, is sometimes viewed as an inconvenience.  After all, there is the inconvenience of not eating meat on Ash Wednesday, all of the Friday's of Lent, and of course, you would not think of eating meat on Good Friday.  There is the requirement of fasting.  There is nothing crabbier on this earth than Michael The Lesser when he is hungry.  Luckily, due to my advanced age, I am exempt from fasting. Lent can be very inconvenient indeed.  I remember once when I was a child, about ten years old I would say, my father, took me to the Chicago Auto Show.  We looked at all of the cars and trucks and were amazed at all of the new features that were coming out. Could cars get any more modern?  Well, the time came to have a little snack.  My father, knowing my love of hot dogs bought me a Vienna Weiner - they are about the best hot dog you can get.  It came with all of the trimmings including hot peppers. I took a big bite of the hot dog, enjoying its steamy goodness, the soft steamed bun, the bite of the hot pepper, the taste of the mustard and relish all combined and made me think that this was what heaven had to be like!  As I swallowed that first bite my father, who did not practice any religion, reminded me it was Friday and that I was eating meat. He laughed.  I ran, not walked, to the nearest garbage can and spit the crumbs still in my mouth out and threw the rest of the sandwich into the trash.  My father thought it was hilarious! I was serious about my religion at age ten. So, that is one time when Lent was most inconvenient for me.  I no longer see Lent as an inconvenience, at least most of the time.  I see it as a chance to go on a journey, to walk next to Jesus.  To walk arm in arm with Him as he leads me through the desert of my life.  As we walk he points out improvements I can make and things that I should notice. And all through this journey with Jesus, I am carrying ashes with me. 

Ashes, what a strange thing to use at the start of a journey.  After all, ashes are really not good for a whole lot. As a matter of fact, they are what is left over when something has been completely consumed. Ashes are dirty, they get into everything. They change what was white into something that is gray or even black.  Ashes, why should we carry dirty ashes upon a journey?  And more than that, why should we carry ashes along with us on this most important of journeys?  The ashes we receive on this holy day are a reminder that we too are little more than ashes ourselves. We are reminded that God created us out of the dust and that someday our earthly body will return to dust. When we think of this we should really examine our lives. We brought nothing into this world and we will take nothing out of it. We busy ourselves with the things we think we need. The ashes we receive on this first day of Lent remind us not to value so much the things that decay. It is true, that we need some basic things to stay alive in this world.  We need food, but do we eat too much?  We need water but do we waste this precious commodity?  We need a place to keep ourselves warm but do we need to make a statement by having much more room than we need? We need clothing, but how much do we need? You see, everything that we consider a need is matter and it decays.  The stuff of earth is around just for a little while and then it is gone.  We fight and scramble for the things of this world and when we die, someone else gets all of the things we considered our treasure. Ashes, useless, dry, dirty and dusty ashes serve as a reminder of where we have been and where we are going.  So it is good that we start this Lenten journey with ashes on our forehead.  Maybe we should move those ashes from our forehead to our heart.